Thanks and A Glimpse Into My Week!

Kristi, girl, you were actually a great help! Can you believe I had never played around with the fonts and colors since first starting my blog 3 years ago?? I just had so much fun changing a few things around! The last time anything was changed on here, design wise, it was done by my friend Amber. So at least I know I can change colors and fonts now. Yea me! I'm still a little disappointed that I don't know how to get the photo of my tree centered or at least get my text in the red area to the right of the photo.

RITA - your blog header has 3 photos on it. How did you do that?

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I thought I'd share a glimpse of our week with you.

THURSDAY past was of course Thanksgiving. It took me two days to recuperate after Thanksgiving Day. I love hosting and decorating and cooking! It's just the day or two after that I dislike. Due to my RA (rheumatoid arthritis), my joints become inflamed and swollen and I become very fatigued when I 'over do'. I knew Friday, the day after, would be rough! This caused me to intentionally stay up cleaning and putting away crystal, etc. so that my family wouldn't have to 'work around it' the next couple of days while I was out of the picture. I went to bed around 3 a.m. and knew I'd be staying down awhile. Thankfully, God has blessed me with a husband who knows how to fend for himself and a son who is respectful and obedient, who loves helping.

We had a friend's nine year old daughter spend Thanksgiving night here as well. She and Shane played and entertained each other all day Friday while I crept in and out of "consciousness" (slept) all day. I did get up around 3 p.m. to eat a little something. After a bit it was back to bed.

Saturday I was able to get up around noon. After taking my meds and puttering around a bit, I felt good enough to put away my Thanksgiving decor and start putting out bits of my Christmas things. I hung the wreath on the front door, hung a large "Merry Christmas" sign in our den. Shane put out two of my hand painted friends in the front plant beds. They're made out of wood and have wooden stakes attached to the back of them to be hammered into the ground. I just love driving up to the house after being out and seeing them there to greet me!

Sunday was of course church services. In the afternoon, I went over to help a friend of mine finish some packing and attend to a few details before moving out of her apartment. Please pray for this single mom and her precious little daughter. Sunday evening, church again, then back to help my friend. I loaded some things into our SUV that were to be donated to the HOPE CHILDREN'S HOME thrift store and told her I'd take care of getting them there. It was getting late, her car was already loaded down, and she still had to get uniforms for school ready and her work uniform ready.

I URGE you to CLICK ON THIS LINK TO THE HOME . Once there, click to watch the video of the children and Dr. Higgins draw the name of the winner of a brand new Toyota Prius. Your heart will be well blessed to see how much money was raised for the home. The entire video is 9 min. 54 sec. The children sing part way into the video. It's precious to hear the teeny one's voices!

Monday, Shane awoke with a sore throat and all stuffy. We made a feeble attempt at doing lessons. He did a partial math lesson and typed out the 50 states in alphabetical order. Most of the day was spent lounging. I washed my rugs. Whoo-hoo! Big time stuff huh?

I did find myself on the phone a lot Monday. One conversation with my Pastor's wife was thrilling!!! A great big blessing had occurred and relief flooded both our souls!

Also, my mother had an appointment with her surgeon due to her latest breast sonogram showing three lumps and two abnormal lymph nodes. This is worrisome due to the fact my mom is a breast cancer survivor and in the past has undergone a partial mastectomy. She has been in remission for several years. Monday, new sonograms and exams were done, specifically zeroing in on those lymph nodes. Please pray for Mom as she goes in for two separate local biopsies on Friday, Dec. 12. Then it's pray and wait for the results which will take several days.

The HUGE blessing in this situation is that Mom got into HERE!, only having to wait for ONE WEEK! We are quick to realize that this is a miracle, and God is in the workings. We KNOW that scripture tells us "all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to HIS purpose". Mom's doctor called with the results of her sonogram and told her to phone her surgeon right away for an appointment. Mom's surgeon has moved away since her last breast surgery, so she called a lawyer friend whose wife recently went through breast cancer. The lawyer friend took charge. It turned out he once was Mr. Moffitt's neighbor. (Mr. Moffitt being the founder of MOFFITT CANCER CENTER AND RESEARCH INSTITUTE. It turned out that mom's lawyer friend had represented Mr. Moffitt in personal matters. His law firm also works on behalf of the Cancer Center itself. He made a few calls, had the appointment set up for mom. Mom received a call from Moffitt Cancer Center, letting her know she had an appointment and would that particular day and time work for her. She simply had to show up on Monday and sign in! Isn't that just awesome? It's a GOD thing! She is God's child and HE cares for her, evidencing HIS love by working out details, causing her less stress in an unpleasant situation.
I'm a firm believer that God brings people into our lives for many reasons. We certainly feel that Mom and her friendship with this particular lawyer and his family was no accident!

Tuesday was a tad better than Monday! Shane still wasn't feeling well but was able to study for his English grammar test and complete an entire math lesson. LISTEN - that's better than what we accomplished Monday! I "piddled" around the house. Is "piddled" a new word for you? My mom uses it often. When you "dabble" or do "odds and ends" is also known, at least by my family, as "piddling". My honey brought home 'Carne Asada' from our favorite authentic Mexican restaurant, Los Vallartas. What a scrumptious treat that was! The steak is grilled with onions, served with Mexican rice, refried beans, pico-de-gallo, guacamole, homemade tortillas! I must stop describing this meal. I'm now drooling all over my laptop!

Wednesday I woke up with a sore throat and stuffy head. (Thanks Shane!) I managed to do a load of laundry and get it put away, administer Shane's grammar test, on which he made an At!!! I also did some work on the computer. (homeschooling stuff) I also managed to lie on the couch quite a bit! We did make it to mid-week service and Patch Club at church. We invited one of Shane's newest friends from church over to spend the night Friday night. He will be helping us celebrate my baby's 11th birthday!

Thursday is going great! Thank you Lord! Chores and math are finished. I plan on doing some shopping tonight for my little man's birthday tomorrow. We plan on dining at the Olive Garden Friday evening, then taking the two boys to shop at Toy R Us. I plan on giving them each a $20.00 bill to spend however they please. I'm getting by cheap! I figure my total expenditures will come out less this way than if I were to have planned a traditional party, having several friends over to feed and give goodies to and decorate for. Shane is happy with the set up for this year's birthday and that is the most important of course. I mean, after all, it is HIS special day!

REMEMBER: God cares about every detail of your life! I trust you feel His presence today.

The Spoon Theory

Living with a chronic illness can be very unsettling at times. Many times I feel that I'm not doing my part for my family. I'm not holding up my end of the bargain, so to speak. When I read the following article on Deby's blog, I knew I had to post it here so that family members and friends who read my blog can get an insight to my thoughts. I didn't write 'The Spoon Theory', but the dear person who did write it has articulated my heart so well!

THE SPOON THEORY

Shane Posted!

Hi All! Happy Friday. Shane is a little dismayed that he has only one comment on his recent post! I told him that because he rarely posts, folks don't check his blog as often. So here is a head's up everyone! Shane has posted and is soliciting comments! Thanks for your cooperation-as usual! Simply CLICK HERE!



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Things have been "different" or "a little off" around here lately. I can't really put my finger on why, but I seem to be in a slump. Since the humidity and rainy season has hit us full powered here in Florida, I seem to be having some flare up with old Arthur! (Arthritis) I am experiencing fatigue which is making me angry!



I've been feeling so good these past few months and can't imagine going back through a flare as bad as the one last year. I've noticed I'm letting a lot more go undone around my house, which bothers me. I know it isn't the end of the world if my home isn't spotless, but I spend so many hours here yet seem to get nothing accomplished. I do a little and rest, I do a little more, and rest again. I find quoting some of my favorite scriptures and reading some favorite Bible passages help keep my attitude adjusted.



And what could the Lord send to cheer me but my sweet boy, Shaney Pooh! He is such a source of encouragement and love. He was so grown up the other night as I realized right before retiring to bed that I had forgotten to get his favorite sheets out of the dryer. I had painfully gotten myself up from the couch and had said goodnight, when bang-I remembered I had washed his sheets that day. I groaned, "Oh no, I forgot to get your fresh sheets out and make your bed!" I then headed toward the laundry room. Shane grabbed hold of my arm and said, "Mom, that's ok. Just go to bed. I'll take care of it." And he did! I felt so loved by his sweet pat and helping attitude. Now mind you-he had other sheets, clean and folded in the linen closet, but he prefers his crispy white ones, which of course, were the ones I had taken from his bed that day and washed.



A great highlight of the week was finally getting to see Jackie, Brian, and the babies! Let me tell you - they are the most precious babies you could ever know! I hadn't seen Elena since she was 10 months old. She is now going on 3 years. We fell in love with her gigantic smile and her petite hands constantly combing her long curls out of her face. Shane has been going around the house imitating the gesture. Its so cute! (Patti, if you're reading this, Elena reminds me of Natalie at the age of 3 with her small body, but big smile and big hair!)



This was my first time to meet Abby. What a cutie pie and so good! She is so calm and full of fat baby rolls! She has "cankles"!! Do y'all know what those are?

Here's my sister Rita, with her grandbaby, Abby!

The entire McCobb Family!

(Dear Jackie, Could I please get an updated family photo of you guys?)

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My nephew was married a couple of weeks ago. The happy couple has now returned home from their honeymoon, settling in to Married Life. From what I've been told, all is going well. To see photos of the intimate, outdoor ceremony, visit my sister's blog by CLICKING HERE! and HERE!

Rheumatoid Arthritis" What Is It?"

I'm sure most of you who read my blog know by now that I suffer from RA. I thought I'd post the following explanation I found in my Arthritis Today magazine.

Rheumatoid arthritis (rue-ma-TOYD arth-write-tis) is a chronic disease, mainly characterized by inflammation of the lining, or synovium, of the joints. It can lead to long-term joint damage, resulting in chronic pain, loss of function and disability.

Thankfully, this picture is not of my hands. However, this is an example of severe joint damage caused by RA. I have very minimal deformities when comparing my hands to those of this dear soul.

Rheumatoid arthritis (RA) progresses in three stages. The first stage is the swelling of the synovial lining, causing pain, warmth, stiffness, redness and swelling around the joint. Second is the rapid division and growth of cells, or pannus, which causes the synovium to thicken. In the third stage, the inflamed cells release enzymes that may digest bone and cartilage, often causing the involved joint to lose its shape and alignment, more pain, and loss of movement.


Because it is a chronic disease, RA continues indefinitely and may not go away. Frequent flares in disease activity can occur. RA is a systemic disease, which means it can affect other organs in the body. Early diagnosis and treatment of RA is critical if you want to continue living a productive lifestyle. Studies have shown that early aggressive treatment of RA can limit joint damage, which in turn limits loss of movement, decreased ability to work, higher medical costs and potential surgery.

RA affects 1 percent of the U.S. population or 2.1 million Americans. Currently, the cause of RA is unknown, although there are several theories. And while there is no cure, it is easier than ever to control RA through the use of new drugs, exercise, joint protection techniques and self-management techniques. While there is no good time to have rheumatoid arthritis, advancements in research and drug development mean that more people with RA are living happier, healthier and more fulfilling lives.

Pam adds: ,I'm happy to report that after my terrible flare up last year which lasted about six months, I am now doing much better. New medications and feeling well enough to start up my walking and exercise routine have been God sends. I've lost right at 25 lbs. and feel so much better. I still have pain on a daily basis, but oh, so much bearable than at this time last year. I can't stress it enough here that the key to feeling better, whether you have a chronic disease or not, depends on your diet and exercize. Eating good, nutritional foods are a must for those of us with RA. Our bodies need all those good vitamins and minerals found in whole foods. Many of you prayed for me during those difficult days. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Some symptoms which manifest themselves in me are:

Cervical spine (the neck): Symptoms include neck stiffness, weakness, and loss of motion. Other symptoms often can't be felt or seen in exams. Ligaments are often inflamed, and there may be problems with the spinal cord or nervous system. Neck pain alone tends to get better, even when the joints are damaged. Damage to the nervous system does not usually improve.

Shoulders: The main symptom is loss of motion. Your body's unconscious reaction to shoulder pain is simply not to use your shoulders. Since daily life doesn't require much shoulder use, frozen shoulder syndrome can set in quickly.

Hands and wrists: Almost everyone with RA has affected wrists. Joints in the middle of your hand and fingers are usually affected. The knuckles at the ends of your fingers usually are not. RA can cause joint deformities that freeze your fingers in unusual positions. Rheumatoid nodules and tendon inflammation can make it hard to bend the fingers. Nodules can cause a locking and catching action as your fingers bend.

Knees: It is easy to feel the swelling in the knees. A fluid-filled lump called a Baker's cyst often appears behind the knee. It can burst and leak fluid into the calf.

Feet and ankles: RA commonly affects the joints in the middle of the toes and the ankle joints. The deformities and pain in the toes can cause problems with walking. The sole of the foot can feel tingly or numb.

The progression of RA is hard to predict. The swelling of RA flares up and dies down, and milder forms of the disease often don't require much treatment. Mild RA may even go undiagnosed.

GOOD MONDAY MORNING!

I can't believe we are starting our second week of fourth grade today! Shane is loving all of his curriculum, SO FAR!!! I pray that continues. He received a 100% on his first Spelling Test Friday and only missed one problem on his math quiz!

Friends, once again, I would like to ask for your prayers. I've learned that you ladies (and few men) who read my blog, are people of prayer, so I present to you my next challenge.

I really should have shared this with you last Monday, the day I had to stop my medications for the Rheumatoid Arthritis. You see, this Tuesday, ( 9/11 ), I will be having a breast biopsy done. My meds can cause free bleeding, so for apparent reasons, I was told to discontinue them the week before the biopsy. I also had to discontinue my daily vitamin, due to it containing vitamin E, which can also cause bleeding.

Many of you probably remember that back in Nov. through May, I was in terrible pain and hardly slept at all. My old meds were no longer working for me. I turned to blogging as an escape from pain. I'd be up all hours of the night suffering. Thus, the title of my blog "MIDNIGHT MUSINGS".

Needless to say, without my anti-inflammatory and pain meds, I don't function well. The first day off of them this week, I must admit I was A-OK, but by Wednesday, I felt like I was in a full blown withdrawal. I had the chills and shakes and felt so weak. My joints began hurting and I was seeing joints swell up right before my very eyes! I couldn't concentrate and my speech was slurred; and all this while trying to get through the first week of homeschool with Shane. Oh, and did I mention I was really GRUMPY??? With the Lord's help, we did meet most of our schooling goals for the week. I know it was due to my church family and my dad's church family praying for me. I am some better now. What a sweet blessing to know that other's can approach my Heavenly Father on my behalf! It seems the withdrawal stage is over but I feel as though I have the flu and some joints are achy each day, and you guessed it -- I CAN'T SLEEP! I know this is only temporary. I was instructed to start my meds back up a few days after the biopsy, so I'm thinking around Friday.

A little sample of my swelling! and oh the pain in that middle finger especially!

NOW, what I would seek your prayers for right now is for me to get through one more week with minimal pain. Also that the biopsy goes well and the growth isn't malignant. God's will be done!

BLESSING IN A BOX !
The Leonard family picked Shane up for S.S. and church Sunday morning. Agustin was at work, I was in pain! When they brought Shane home after services, they also brought 3 delicious pizzas and 3 different types of sodas! YUM! I had never tried Papa John's Barbecue Pizza.

It was awesome and we all highly suggest it! Thanks Kim and Mike, Alex, and Ashley for being such a blessing! I also enjoyed their company as it helped get my mind off of me for an hour or so. Of course, since Mike was here, I got plenty of laughing in!!!

Here's Mike on New Year's Eve, 2006. No it's not what you think! The guy IS NOT drunk! The adornment of the little flashlight on his head was assisting him in his quest to find one of the girl's missing pieces of jewelry, which was lost while we were in the yard setting off fireworks.

Meet "Little Man Sam"

PLEASE WATCH and then PLEASE PRAY for this little guy and his family.

http://www.arthritis.org/donate/sam.asp?CampaignId=E07E1XMYZZ021090870

HORROR OF ALL HORRORS!

Saturday evening, I had no internet! I fooled around and tried all I knew to do. Finally, exasperated, I called the Verizon Fios hot line. I got a nice friendly tech named Larry in Texas!! We walked through all kinds of protocol. First thing Larry told me was that he could see that my back up battery on my FIOS box was depleted. It's freaky how they can know that all the way in Texas! My next thought was: "What else does he see?" It took a good 15 minutes of following his instructions on the phone. This included a trip to the garage to check if the Verizon box was plugged in. It was, but the battery light was lit. I reset the safety outlet. Things looked fine. I breathed a sigh of relief. Too early! The tech, on the other end of the line told me to get on line. I clicked my Internet Explorer icon and nada! When I told the tech it was a no-go, his voice told of his disappointment! It was decided he would send a real live tech to my home on Sunday. He thought I may need a new, updated router. What was a good time? I told him around 1:30 p.m. That would give us plenty of time to return from church. So it was set up! I went to bed soon afterwards with dreams of sugar plums and internet access in my head!

I awakened Sunday morning around 7 a.m. to take Agustin to work so I would have the car for church. I had a long day and had been on my feet quite a bit Saturday. I had come home from our Mother & Daughter Luncheon and taken care of some things around the house, so I was pretty swollen and over tired. (For those new to my blog, I have Rheumatoid Arthritis which has been causing me quite a bit of pain lately). I went hobbling out to the driveway with my husband. I was stiff but willing to try and drive. We noticed a steady stream of water coming from under the grass at our curb and out to the street. Then we heard our Culligan water system making a weird, loud noise! It sounded like water and air whooshing through the pump, but not into the house - rather into the street! PANIC! Agustin told me to get on the phone and take care of it, he had to get on to work! So I take my crippled self to the tanks and try to push the "bypass" button. It didn't budge. It's not a little, ol' bitty button, mind you. It's a big, fat, honking button! I ran in the garage and unplugged it. I noticed none of the lights were on for my Verizon Fios box on the garage wall, but yet it was plugged in. The light bulb went off in my head! I think I knew why I didn't have internet! Back outside I went, shucks, I still could hear the whooshing! Back inside, I went to the garage and hit the reset button for the outlet. Wa-la, all appropriate lights came on to show my wonderful FIOS was in operating condition. I was right! My light bulb moment earlier was spot on! The stupid water purification system was malfunctioning, causing my outlet to trip the safety thingy!! I just knew in my heart of hearts, I was about to have my internet back! Who cares about fresh tasting, purified water?? I was dying of internet withdrawal, not of thirst! I turned on my computer and while waiting for it to boot up, I dug into the file cabinet and found all the info about my Culligan system. I called the office, which was NOT opened at 7:30 a.m. on Sunday morning, but yes, there was an emergency message system. I left my message then came to get on line while I waited for a tech to call me back.

What sweet splendor! There it was, just like I remembered it! The internet, my blog! Joy, joy, joy! I was hurting and exhausted. It felt good to get off my feet now and sit in my leather executive chair! I started checking my emails and blog comments. OOPS! It then hit me, I had to call Verizon and cancel the order for a service tech to come out at 1:30 p.m. After the call to them, I had to find a neighbor who was awake and willing to come over and bang that big button in, so as to bypass the water on the Culligan system. After that, I debated what to do. I didn't have the car to get to church and it was getting late. I was also experiencing excruciating pain in my shoulders, left side of neck, wrists, and feet. I debated what to do. It's during these times that I realize I do have somewhat of a handicap with this chronic disease. I really wanted to get to church, but did not have the energy to shower and dress and think of who to call for a ride, and this I would have to do in a rush. It hurts me to have to tell this part of the story. I felt spent! I had pushed myself Saturday and now Sunday morning had been hectic. I started shutting down. It's as if my brain and entire body shuts off. Thankfully I had taken my medications, vitamins and herbs earlier. They would kick in soon. All I could do was crawl into my bed. I fell asleep for several hours and awoke with much less pain.

It hurts me and embarrasses me sometimes that I tire so easily. I fear I give the impression as though it doesn't take much to stop me. It hasn't always been this way, believe me! I'm not a lazy person at all. I have learned over the past 17 years with this chronic disease, what my body can or cannot do. My husband is constantly reminding me to pace myself, but in emergency's, that can't be done! I just have to turn it over to my Heavenly Father when I feel down about not being the old Pam. (Or should I say the YOUNG PAM?) I'm so happy HE is always there for me to turn to. I also have many wonderful friends who encourage me and support me in many ways.

Now, to close on a positive note! I must say that Larry, the Verizon tech, was so kind and patient with me on the phone Saturday night. Another great blessing was how quickly the nice man on emergency call for Culligan called me within 15 minutes of my leaving a message with the answering service. That was quite impressive on a Sunday morning!

God bless you my friends. I trust you will have a beautiful rest of the week.

At Least I Can Still Blog...

Shane and I - CHRISTMAS OF 2004!

I may not be able to clean house or be on my feet for long, but at least I can still blog! {Even if it is at a slower speed than I am accustomed to.} I've had some very painful days and have been discouraged that I can't just wake up and "be over it"! But I know HIS grace is sufficient. I am anxiously awaiting my Dr's appointment. I have been on natural supplements for about 3 months now and don't see or feel that they are helping. Could it be possible my anti-inflammatory is conflicting with them? I am to the point at which I will eagerly ask my Doc for Prednisone! Sorry Pat & Jackie, please don't pass out after reading that! (smiles)But at least I can still blog!

I do get a little relief in late afternoons. That is when I attempt to clean the kitchen and do laundry. Just today, I finally got my buffet table cleaned off from Christmas Eve and washed the table cloths! The food had been put away thanks to Kim; but the candles, crumbs, decorations, and sweets were still sitting there through out the week. I just didn't have it in me to tackle it. Agustin is so tickled he can finally fold that table back up and have more space in the kitchen. I'm sure it was a comical scene today as I pulled up a chair near the table and studied it to find an easy way to push and pull it back into place with my crippled hands, wrists, and shoulders! I would touch the right points on that table but nothing would budge. I just sat there for I don't know how long, willing it to slide and move into place. Where is David Copperfield when you need him? But at least I can still blog!

Well I have Agustin home tomorrow, so we will get some stuff done! Bless his heart, please remember him in your prayers as well, as he is helping me dress and is doing more around the house these past few weeks. As of late, he has been rubbing my neck and shoulders with Bio freeze and the like before he showers to go to work. Shane has been such a little trooper, having to entertain himself a little more than usual while I am out of commission. I am taking several short naps a day and through out the nights. I am longing for a full night's rest. But at least I can still blog!

His love has been the best medicine for my pain!

Speaking of blogging...I was so thrilled when I visited Amber's blog a little bit ago and saw photos from our fun and busy week-end! Thanks Amber! And by the by, I will take you up on that massage with hot towels as soon as you can get your gangstah self over here! And for Miriam and Rachel, I am about due for another pedicure. I would love to get my two aunts here for one apiece as well! We shall see.

Shane and I did get a math lesson and history lesson done today. He also practiced his cursive writing by writing the capital letters. We are doing little snippets of schooling here and there because we got so far behind the 2 weeks before Christmas.

Well, I am going to try to get some shut eye. I will probably sleep an hour or two then wake up in pain. I pray that is not the case, but I must be realistic. I assume the pain gets worse because I lie in one position for too long and also the medications wear off. So I have to get up and move around or take a hot soak in the tub, or a hot shower. Depends if I can get down into the tub and back out again. Once in a past flare up, I took a late night bath while on vacation at my parents in Indiana. I sat there for hours and had to keep running hot water into the tub. No one could hear me hollering for help! They had all been sleeping for some time. Josh was a small boy, and Agustin wasn't with me on the trip. I can laugh about it now, but boy, that night was long! I was so happy when my mom woke up for a nightly potty run and found me still in the tub. She was able to give me the support I needed to get out. I probably wasn't stuck in there for as long as it felt. I have always been thankful that I hadn't locked that door! But at least I can still blog!

Love and Prayers to all you bloggers! At least we can still blog!

Vitamins/Minerals to Help With RA

What You Need and Why


Vitamin A (and beta-carotene) Antioxidant, which decreases cell and tissue damage
Vitamin B complex Energy production, healthy nerves and healthy tissues (muscle, bones, joints and skin)
Vitamin C Healthy collagen, the major protein in cartilage and bones
Vitamin D Bone health, works with calcium
Vitamin E Antioxidant, healthy immune system
Vitamin K Bone building
Calcium Bone health, works with vitamin D
Zinc Anti-inflammatory

Why I Can't Sleep!

I have actually seen people in my Rheumatologist's office with hands that looked just like the above rendering!

The two top photos of my hands were taken on a day when I wasn't very swollen.



Well its 3:07 in the morning and I haven't been able to sleep yet. I am typing this in a most awkward manner because only a few of my fingers are functioning. I really am shocked, because I felt pretty good for a few hours today and had quite a fruitful day! Shane and I wrapped some presents, did school, some laundry and some bill paying. I thought this would be the night for some sweet slumber. I was wrong! Oh well! The photos above of my hands were taken about 2 weeks ago. The fingers were swollen to what felt like twice their true size. Tonight, my worst pain and swelling is the middle finger of the left hand. I swear, it looks 3 times it true size! My right shoulder, both wrists, right foot and right jaw are causing misery also. Other fingers are swollen as well, but that middle one is the star of the show tonight!


I trust you all don't percieve this as a "poor me" story. I just find it helps me to share the realities of my life. I know many people don't really "get me" and must wonder why I hardly do anything. You know, its hard for me to make daily plans because I never know if I'll be able to physically meet my obligation. I make many plans with this thought and prayer in mind: "Lord, you know I want to do this. (whatever the occassion might be.) Please help me get there. It will be a great experience for Shane. Help me not to worry about the 'what ifs' of tomorrow. I know you love me and want me to reflect that love. Please help my attitude. Help me tactfully cancel if I must." and so on and so forth; you get the idea! For example, I have plans to drive to Sun City tomorrow (today!) and get my aunt who is visiting from Indiana. She is going to stay with us a few days before Christmas. She is one of the easiest house guests one could ever hope for. Thank God! My house needs vacuuming and dusting. Both bathrooms need to be cleaned. I have ironing piled in my breakfast room. Shane wanted to bake cookies so badly tonight but I just couldn't. Once again, I told him "Maybe tomorrow." I also had to say no to my friend Bianca for today. She needed someone to care for her two precious boys and based on my condition at the time of her phone call, I truthfully knew I could not do it. That's hard for me to accept sometimes - the fact that I can't do something I LOVE!!!Oh how I would have loved to been able to hear my Kaden's giggle and hold baby boy Aaron in my arms!


Shane with Kaden and Aaron

Baby Aaron in my arms a few weeks ago!

Okay, enough now! I am going to try to sleep. Goodnight!